Icky finicky

I have the blahs. I also have the angries. This causes problems. I don't want to do anything, and EVERYTHING is upsetting me, but I don't want to do anything about it, so I get more angry because I'm not getting anywhere. Make sense? Not to me either. I think I'm nuts. Oh well. I'm not sure, but I think it may be a touch of PMS. I don't want it to be, but at least then I'd feel justified in my craziness.

This week's been hectic already. We had missions emphasis at Newcastle this entire weekend which meant lots of driving and trying to be social when we were tired. But it all went fairly well. We spent the weekend at Mom & Dad's though so they could watch Brayden while we were missioning. That helped out a ton. I'd have liked to leave Tyler too, but Mom isn't quite comfortable with that yet since he's still attached to his food source (i.e. me).

Last night I didn't get a whole lot of sleep... Tyler decided he didn't want to sleep alone, so I took him and slept with him on the couch in the living room. That actually wasn't too uncomfortable, but at the same time, it's a lot more pleasant to sleep without a child on you. But I have to remind myself that these days don't last very long and someday I'll be wishing that I had my little cuddlebug back. Maybe.

Herman & Melissa had their baby last night. His name is Noah Rylan. He was born at 1:40 am, weighed 7 lbs 13 oz and was 20 in long. He looks a lot like Herman. Holding him gave me baby fever again, but I think my ickies tonight made me get over them. I really feel like I'm not a BAD mom, but at the same time, I'm not the best either. I get really frustrated easily and have a hard time coping with the crying boys when I'm tired. I think it all comes down to me being selfish. I'd rather do things like mess on the computer, watch TV or play xbox than do laundry, dishes or read a book to the boys. I would really like to work on that, but I keep making excuses or saying to myself that I'll do it later or tomorrow...